The dog man

   A man was in the centre of the city needing to urinate and there was no public bathroom near him. The man observed that there was no passerby looking at him, stopped in front of a post and started to do it. But the sound of the urine against the post and the liquid flowing on the street got a woman’s attention:

   -My God, what horrible thing are you doing?

   The man looked at the woman that looked at him with shame and invented a sad story:

   -When I was born my mother abandoned me in a trash can. A female dog met me, pitied and took care of me. I am the dog man!

  (Osmar Batista Leal) 

     "O homem cachorro" , versão em português desta fábula encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

THE PSICHOPATH OLD WOMAN

  

    

   A man stopped to rest in front of a cemetery, sat on the floor, leaned against the wall and said:

   -There are two worlds. One of them is into and the other one is off of each of us.  

    The man looked  at the stars and continued saying:

   -The world that is into each of us is limited, but the other one is unlimited.

    And then an old woman holding a scythe appeared to the man interrupting his monologue:

   -You are fooled. The world that is into each of us is unlimited and the other one is limited.

   The man was scared and asked:

   -Are you going to take me?

   But the old woman answered:

   -No, I am not going.

   The man asked again:

   -But aren’t you the death?

   And the old woman said:

   -I am only a crazy old woman that likes to kill people, but I don’t know for where you go after I cut your neck.  

   (Osmar Batista Leal) 
  
    "A velha psicopata " versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor. 

MUSTACHE, BEARD AND HAIR

  

Mustache, beard and hair

   A man decided to let growing his mustache and when the mustache was already covering his mouth, the man went to cut it and heard a voice:

   -Are you sure you want to cut your big mustache?

   The man had the feeling that heard his own mustache speaking, but he said:

   -Mustaches don’t speak…I am having a hallucination!

   And the voice answered:

   -It isn’t a hallucination. I am the soul of your grandfather that died when you were young and now, I incarnated in you mustache…

   The man cut his mustache, never heard that voice more and then he decided to let growing his beard. But when his beard was already covering half of his face, he went to cut it and heard a voice again:

   -Are you sure you want to cut his big beard?

   The man had a feeling that heard his own beard speaking, but he said:

   -Beards don’t speak…I am having another hallucination!

   And the voice answered:

   -It isn’t a hallucination. I am the soul of your great-grandfather that died when you were a child and now, I incarnated in your beard…

    The man cut his beard, never heard that voice more and then he decided to let growing his hair. But when his hair was already too big, he went to cut it and heard another voice:

    -Are you sure you want to cut your big hair?

    And the man asked quickly:

    Are you the soul of my great-great-grandfather that died when I still didn’t live?

    And the voice answered:

    -No, I am your barber!

 (Osmar Batista Leal)     

   

    "Bigode, barba e cabelo" , versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

  

THE NEXT GENERATION

The next generation

   An old mattress was abandoned near an anthill. The ants approached and their queen said:

   -Drag that object into our anthill to our specialist scientist ants study about its utility.

   And while the worker ants obeyed their queen, they talked between them. One of them said:

   -Why do we need to drag this object to our specialist scientist study its utility if we already know that the man used it to rest?

   Other ant answered:

   -Because we need to deepen our knowledge about the rest.

   The ant asked again:

   -And for whom the knowledge about the rest will serve, if we never stop working?

   The ant answered:

   -For the next generations.

   But the ant said:

   -If we continue dragging everything that the men abandon near our anthill, our next generation will be mutant ants!

  (Osmar Batista Leal)             


    "A próxima geração", versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

THE USED BOOT

  

    An used boot was abandoned near an anthill. The ants approached and their queen said:

   -Drag this object into our anthill to our specialist scientist ants study its utility.

  And while the worker ants obeyed their queen, they talked between them. One of them asked:

   -Wasn’t this object used by the man to walk?

   Other ant answered:

   -As far as I know, it was.  

   And the ant said:

   -Then if we enter this object and fix its internal mechanism maybe it ride us, rather than we ride it.

   But the other ant answered:

   -This is a boot, but isn’t a car.      

   (Osmar Batista Leal)

   "A bota usada", versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

OUR DAILY SUGAR

    

    A bottle was abandoned near an anthill containing rest of soda. The ants approached while one of them was attracted by sugar and entered the bottle. A human hand appeared unexpectedly, put a top and threw the bottle in the trash.

    The ants dispersed themselves except the ant that was arrested and passed the rest of the life consuming the soda of the bottom of the bottle.

  (Osmar Batista Leal)  

   "A última comida", versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor. 

THE WORLD OF A WOMAN WHO WASN'T NAMED SOFIA

      

     A woman that lived in a place far from the tumult of the city was woken in the morning by a knock on the door of her hut. The woman opened the door and didn’t see anybody, but a box has been left. She opened the box, took a paper and started to read the follow message:

     “There is a buried treasure near from here…”

     The woman stopped to read, holding the box and threw away the paper, saying:

      -I detest fiction, but I am going to utilize this box to place my things.

   (Osmar Batista Leal)  

     "O mundo de uma mulher que não se chamava Sofia" , versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES, ou com o autor.

ADMIRABLE ELECTRONIC WORLD

   A crab took off his coat, loosened his tie, entered his car with his wife and his son and then they went down to the sea. But when they arrived on the beach, the son of the crabs said:

   -What boring place! I would prefer to have stayed home playing video game. 

    (Osmar Batista Leal)


   "Admirável mundo eletrônico", versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

SMILING EASELS

   

   Two drunken men that heeled along the street met smiling easels. Therefore one of the drunken men irritated himself, held the easel in front of him and asked:

   -Why are you joked about us?

   And then the other drunken man answered:

   -They will joke about us when they elect themselves. For the time being, they are just smiling for you!

    (Osmar Batista Leal)   

   "Cavaletes sorridentes", versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor. 

THE HOLE OF THE SINK

   

 

    A man got in the morning, went to wash his face and when he closed the tap, looked at the water running to the hole of the sink and thought to himself:  

     “What big thief the man is! He created a mechanism to take from the water what he wants and then making it run (as if the water was the thief) taking what he doesn’t want anymore.  

  (Osmar Batista Leal)

  "O buraco da pia" ,versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

THE COW, THE FLY AND THE MAN

   A cow grazed in a field when a fly sat on his back. The cow tried to hit the fly with his tail, saying:

    -Go out from my back, despicable insect!

   But the fly escaped and answered:

   -The man takes your milk, eats your meat and you irritate yourself just with me who only sat on your back!

  The cow thought, but irritated yet more and hit the fly with his tail, killing the insect.

    (Osmar Batista Leal) 


    "A vaca, a mosca e o homem " , versão em português desta fábula, encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

A MAN LYING

  

   A man lying on a bed scratched his head, scratched his penis and said:

   -A pubic louse and a head louse run for president…

   The woman that scratched herself beside the man remained silent and he asked her:

   -Will you vote for the pubic louse or for the head louse?

   And then the woman got up and answered:

   -I am not going to vote…

   The man lying stayed silent and she continued:

   -I am going to leave you scratching yourself alone here and I am going to look for a doctor for a treatment against those parasites.

    (Osmar Batista Leal)   

   "Chega!" ,versão em português para a fábula "A man lying", encontra-se no livro "A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU", à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES, ou com o autor.

THE EASEL

   Two drunken men were reeling along the street and met the photo of a political candidate on a wood easel. One of the drunken men held on the easel and said:

    -Today you are on all fours in my front waiting for my vote, but  tomorrow, when you will be elected, I will be who will be mounted by you.

    And then the other drunken man answered:

     -He will do that if you will be sober or do you think that he is going to want to fall?

  (Osmar Batista leal)

    "Os bêbados e o cavalete" , versão em português para a fábula "The easel" encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

THE HEAD LOUSE AND THE PUBIC LOUSE

     

   A louse came down from the head of an infested man to the pubic region of that same man and the lice of that region elected him their president. But when one of their subordinates informed that a pubic louse needed him, the head louse answered:

    -What that “chato” wants from me?

   (Osmar Batista Leal)

     A versão em português para "The head louse and the pubic louse" encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES.

Polis pediculosis

   

  

   A fine-tooth comb passed and downed a louse from the hair to an under region of the body of an infested man. The louse adapted himself in that new region, understood its language and said to the new louses that he met:

   -I came from a superior region but I feed me with the same blood that you feed yourself.

    And then the pubic lice admired the humble speech of the head louse and elected him as their president.

 (Osmar Batista Leal)

   A versão em português para "Polis pediculosis" encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

    

THE LOUSE OF THE POLIS

     A man lying scratched his head, scratched his penis and said:

   -I think I am going to upset my vote in the next election.

   The woman that scratched herself on the same bed was also worried:

   -It won’t upset the problem. We must look for a doctor for a treatment against our parasites.

   And the man that still scratched himself, answered:

   -I am not worried with the head louse or with the pubic louse, but with the louse of the Polis.

  (Osmar Batista Leal)   

    A versão em português para "The louse of the Polis" encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU , à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor.

THE REPENTANT HORSE

  

    An alligator dreamed with a dragon with his opened mouth in front of him and entered. Into the mouth of the dragon, he saw the way to the hell and the way to the heaven, but woke before following one of the ways. The alligator repented of his sins and opened a church in the forest.

    Several animals heard about the alligator’s vision, came to his church and formed a line to enter the opened mouth. A horse waited for hours in line, but when he entered the mouth he didn’t saw any way. And then the horse turned to leave, saying:

    -If God still didn’t decide about my way after death, it means that I will live for a very long time!

    But the alligator closed his mouth quickly, champed and swallowed the horse, answering:

    -Sometimes what your mind deduces doesn’t happen in reality!

   (Osmar Batista Leal)

      A versão em português para "The repentant horse" encontra-se no livro A PERSEVERANÇA DO TATU, à venda no CLUBE DE AUTORES ou com o autor do livro.